Wal-Mart is robbing me blind!

Let me start by saying: I love Wal-Mart! I really do. It is amazing! My sister loves it too. She calls it the magical place and is often jealous of my frequent trips to this amazing and magical place since she does not have one near here. (Believe it or not! She really doesn't live near one.)

With that said, the other day I bought a few big boxes of Total cereal for $2 each. But when I checked my receipt, they had charged me almost $4 a box. I had to go to customer service to get my money back.

Then while I was in Arizona, my father-in-law mentioned that he has been gypped at Wal-mart multiple times. He said the prices that are marked are not always the prices that they charge. He said that Wal-mart's systems are too complex to make these mistakes on accident. He said it is institutionalized theft.

I told him I thought he was being a little dramatic about it.

Then I remembered that when I bought a book at Wal-mart during my trip, they over charged me again. But I still wasn't convinced.

SOOOOO, get this!!! I went food shopping at Wal-mart today. When I got in the car, I realized that they had over charged me for 4 different items!! I couldn't believe it! I had to, of course, call the manager and regulate. I, very nicely, gave her a piece of my mind.

I will be watching my reciepts VERY closely. I suggest you do the same because ... dear me ... my father-in-law was right! Wal-mart is robbing us blind!!!

Back to Reality ... kind of

We've been out of town for 10 days having so much fun with my family in California and Tim's family in Arizona. "We" refers to me and my girls, of course, because Tim was stuck in Utah at work. And tonight we are flying home. I'm excited to see my friends, but I have really enjoyed just hanging with my families for these two weeks. So much so, that I am coming back to California in a few weeks. He, He, He. Love it.

But probably the main reason I don't want to come home is because coming home from my yearly summer vacation is sort of the traditional start of prepping to go back to work in Fall. Yuck.

For a dozen reasons. Yuck. Yuck. Yuck.

But enough of such an unpleasantly.

In order to cheer myself up, I have created the Top 10 Reasons that my Reality is Great and why I am excited to go home:

10. I have a super fun/ funny/ cute husband.

9. My birthday is coming up, and I get to research which of 3 birthday gifts I want from my folks.

8. I have yummy dirt/ earth food all over my kitchen that I can't wait to eat, and I have a new bread recipe to try.

7. Diapers and Wipes. I am down to 2 diapers for McKenna and about 3 wipes. It is tricky. I hope we make it... we have at least 12 hours to go...

6. I will no longer be limited to having and buying stuff that I can fit into my very small suitcase because I am too cheap to check baggage (even if I am also holding two children, 3 bags, one purse, one car seat and one stroller all at the same time!)

5. Quinn cannot climb out of her real crib as easily as she can her travel bed.

4. Lindsay is taking us up a canyon to her childhood play spot behind her grandparents house in Alpine. I can't wait.

3. Bridget has a new house, and I can't wait to see it!

2. When I am in Utah I am closer to my bank so I can deposit Tim's money into my account after I spend all of mine on cute and wonderful stuff I do not need.

1. We keep our air conditioning on at 71 degrees and love every minute of it!!

Good-bye, Sweat!

Utah, here I come!

The big fit and the giant hurdle

So I indulged myself to no end at an outlet mall in Arizona on Friday. Spent too much money. Spent too much time.

Quinn was pooped, but we just kept shopping. I knew I was getting dangerously close to the nap time window, but, again, we just kept shopping.

She fell asleep on the short drive home, and her aunt Katie got her out of the car while I carried McKenna inside.

That didn't go well.

She was still crying when I put her into her portable crib for her nap. The crying got louder. Stuff started flying, and the requests got more and more ridiculous. "Go" "Stay" "Open the door" "No" "No" "No" "No"!!!!!

This went on for awhile. I tried being the bad cop, the good cop, the quiet mom, the stern mom, the sensitive mom. At times I tried giving her what she wanted, but it was too late ... she was having a fit.

Finally, I decided on a different method. I picked her up out of the crib and carried her into a bedroom. I held her in my arms on the bed (against her will) and talked very softly. She calmed a little and then would freak out again.

Then it happen.

I let go of her and she ran beeline back into her room, and, no joke, she HURDLED into the crib. She just put her hands on the rails and jumped in like it was nobody's business. Then, of course, she proceeded to cry and throw her fit.

I just started laughing hysterically! Since when does she know how to get in and out of a Pack N Play? She sleeps in them all the time and still sleeps in a crib at home. She has never indicated that she knew she could get out on her own. I have always thought that she could get out if she really wanted to, but I had no idea it would be a freakin' piece of cake. I was floored, and it just put the moment in perspective.

I realized this fit was more than I knew what to deal with. I lured her out of it with promises of Barney, and we moved on with out day.

With no nap.

P.S. Of course the next morning, she called for us..."I'm up! Get me out!" I went in and got her out of bed as if she were a little baby who could not do it herself. I'll let her stay little at heart for as long as she wants to. But, wow, now I know the truth.

Potty Disclosure

So for the sake of full disclosure, I guess I am required to give an update on Quinn's potty training.

Yesterday my daddy was watching Quinn while I went to a yoga class this week. Later he told me he was concerned that Quinn never went pee the whole time he was watching her. Oops. Forgot to mention to him that she has completely regressed in potty training and now wears Pull Ups all day. She almost never pees in the potty, but she does love the toilet for going #2... well, she did until we got to California.

It is all mostly my fault. She got a little crazy after McKenna came home, and I decided that I just couldn't love her the way I want to if she is peeing on my carpet!

So basically I love my daughter, and she pees in her pants. Oh Well.

In a few weeks I will take a special day just for Quinn and get her back on track. Then I'll go back to work, and we will see what happens.

But I would not change how we did things for anything. Potty training before McKenna came gave me just the right way to spent some extra special time and attention with my first born angel baby.

Now, if only Pull Ups were free...

Party Pooper

In case it was unclear to anyone: If your baby is sleeping in her car seat, and her poop still manages to make a puddle on the floor -- you are in big trouble!

If it is your first baby, you'll freak out!

But if is your second, you'll just laugh and a mom who also has a toddler and a new baby will help you clean up the mess.

Cleaning will go quickly with too experts at work on it, but it will be more difficult if your 2 year old suddenly becomes scared of the birthday party she's is at and holds on to your leg while you are walking said leaking baby to the ladies' room.

Changing will go smoothly, but unless you brought an extra party dress in your diaper bag, you'll have to take a deep breath of surrender and just put said baby in an old (but clean) Onesie.

Oh, and while you are changing baby and comforting toddler, make Grandpa clean the floor!

Not up for fighting today

So sometimes I know what is best for my daughter, but I am not up for the fight.

In this case, I am talking about Quinn. Today we were in the bath. She wanted to get out of the bath. I wanted to enjoy the bath. I let her get out. I said, "Dry off and go get a pull up." She said, "No, I wear Panties." I said, "No, you wear pull ups." She said, "No, I wear Panties." I said Fine.

Then she found a new box of soap sitting on the edge of the bath. She wanted to open it up and play with it. I said, "No, put it back, please." She said, "No, open it!" I said, "No, put it back please." and She said, "No, open it please mommy." I said Fine.

Later I said, "Ok, that is enough. Put the soup back in the box." She said.... and I finally said Fine.

I just didn't feel like fighting.

I got out of the bath.

She peed in her panties.

She rubbed the bar of soap on her feet.

Then she ate the soap.

The Root Canal Declaration

I formally declare that a root canal is not a big deal. In fact it is quite the treat that takes care of the pain in your mouth.

The only down fall of the root canal is the price. Yikes.

But really why are people so scared? I found out Monday that I needed a root canal, and then got it done the very next day. From Monday at noon to Tuesday at noon about a hundred people looked at me like I was about to take a death march. I was pretty sure this was not the case, but I called my dad just in case.

"Hey, Daddy, What's the story with a root canal?"

"It's a no brainer. No different than a filling. Piece of cake."

My dad is smart as hell, and he especially knows his dental procedure pain levels, so I believed him.

I was delighted to find out that my endodontist works in the very same building as my periodontist! Lucky me! When I got there, all the other patients in the waiting room were making "Oh no, Root Canal!!" comments. Honestly, people, relax!

I asked the nurse why people are all freaked out. She said that in the "Olden days" they couldn't get you as numb as they can now. Right then my doctor walked in. He looked 28. I said, "Perfect, you do not look like you are from the olded days at all."

Both the nurse and the doctor then started over explaining EVERYTHING and sort of talking to me like I was 4 years old. I finally said, "Listen. I'm not scared and I really don't care what you are doing to me. I've got a nursing baby at a friend's house who needs to eat. Let's get this show on the road. Do what you have to do." They relaxed and went to work.

And as if things could not get any better, I found out I could wear movie glasses during the procedure and watch a show. Hook me up, Doc! When he went to get the glasses and movie list, I thought, "If only I could watch 'The Cutting Edge.'" No Joke. The list had 20 movies on it, and The Cutting Edge was one of them!!

Later they gave me a free chap stick!

It pays to send good thoughts into the universe, people, so again I say, "Relax!"

But do remember to take deep, deep breaths during those Novocain shots, 'cause man those hurt like heck! :)

Sleeping Bird, I want nothing, and Stairs are hard

Quinn has been talking like crazy. I feel like there is nothing she can't say, and the best part is that she can totally let us know that she knows what is going on around her.

Here are a few stories to demonstrate. Remember that Quinn stretches out the last word of almost every sentence. So if she says, "It's hard." "Hard will definitely be two parts. Haaa ard.

About a week ago a bird crashed into our sliding glass door and died instantly on our patio. It just laid there on its back. Yikes. Quinn saw the dead bird and said, "Oh, birdy is sleeping?" and "Shhh!! bird asleep." We followed her lead and called it a sleeping bird. I for one was glad we didn't have to have a death talk. She seemed happy with the idea that the bird was just asleep. When she wasn't looking, Tim got a bag, picked up the dead bird and put it in the trash. A few days later it happen again when Tim was at work. I said, "Oh look Quinn, it is a sleeping bird." She talked about the bird for about 10 minutes. When she wanted to go outside a little later, I said, "Quinn stay over here so you don't wake up the sleeping bird." She stood on the stairs for awhile aparently not wanting to walk by the bird. Finally, she looked up at me and said, "Mommy, put sleeping bird trash. Sleeping bird in trash can mommy." I guess she understood more than we realized.

But sometimes language is still tricky for her. The other night at 1:30 a.m. she started crying. I ran down to her room because it seemed unusual for her to cry at that time. I walked into her room and asked her what she wanted. She said, "Nothing. I want nothing." I said, "Ok, Ni-night. love you." As I started to leave, she screamed, "No, I want nothing." She kept repeating herself. Finally, I just got her blankets straightened out, tucked her in and said, "Ok, baby girl here is some nothing. I love you good night." She closed her eyes and went to sleep.

But then again sometimes she really sees the world the way I do!!! The other day I got her out of her crib after a nap, and we started walking up the basement stairs. She was walking in front of me and going pretty slowly. I heard her say, "It's hard. Stairs is hard." I totally agree!!

And the other day, when we were eating apricots together, I had just taken out the pit when she looked up and in the most adult normal voice asked, "What is that called?" I said, "A pit." And she said, "Oh, a pit? Ok. A pit." Like learning Spanish. Only she'll remember English, and I'll never remember all the Spanish I've learned over the years. But it kind of makes me sad that now she will call the seed inside of a peach or apricot a pit and not her standard response for every thing around .. A BALL.

200th Post: SLEEP!!!!

In honor of my 200th post here on Owner of the Band, I want to make a strong declaration that I believe will make most of the people in my life happier.

SLEEP!!!!!

I beg you all: Please get more sleep, and give your children more sleep, too.

Sleep is a gift. Give it. Take it. Receive it.

There is plenty to go around.

Find a way. Get a sitter. Be Strict. Find a routine. Bribe someone. Read books about it. Ask for help. Turn off the TV. Move up the bedtime.

Most of you know that I take my children's sleep very seriously, and most of the time I am just as cautious with my own. My theory about baby's is that -- If they are not hungry, messy or cold, they should be put to bed when they cry. I know that toddlers are more complicated than babies, but basically the same philosophy fits. Why give a Time Out, when you can give the gift of a nap. Tired kids need naps and bedtimes.

This is one important key to a happy life.

Give your kids more sleep. Take more time for your own sleep.

Oh, how I love my children and husband SOOO much more if I am rested. I get more done, feel better about myself, and have more time to serve others when I sleep.

So. My gift to you on this 200th post anniversary is that I will help create sleep for you. If you honestly believe that you or your kids do not need or CAN not get more sleep, email me, and we will figure out a way.

Heal the World. Make it a better place. With sleep.




And as with my 100th post, I will now give a quick update on my tagline.

Thoughts by a lady who loves babies, sustains womanhood, believes in yoga and USED to own a rock band.

Loves Babies: Right now I love my own babies. I consider my Quinny a baby still even though my Avery McKenna is just a 5 week old little nugget. McKenna is a delight. I can't wait for her to laugh and smile all the time. I fear that I don't take enough time for her, and that as she grows this won't change. I want to set some goals to help me spend the right attention with McKenna-benna. Does that make me a horrible person for having to do that or a great person for making sure it happens? Not sure. Right now I am also completely in love with Lindsay's baby, Benny; Lizza's baby, Elsie; and my bother's baby, Vincent. I do love babies. big ones and small ones.

Sustain Womanhood: Right now the biggest part of my life is motherhood, which I love most of the time and feel the huge weight of part of the time. What gift it is to be a woman and to have the chance to be pregnant, give birth, be sensitive, rock a baby, teach a toddler, and be a partner in keeping a little family together. I love my roles as a woman. I love the qualities that are mine because of my womanhood.

Believes in Yoga: I just blogged about this the other day. So you all know how I feel. I believe that yoga (along with Sleep) can heal the world, my world. I am waiting for McKenna to be 6 weeks and eligible for the daycare at the gym so that I can haul my crew to the gym for 8 am yoga. It will be hard since we wake up at 9, but I believe we need it.

Used to own a Rock Band: I have to admit that post-band life is better than my wildest dreams. Our family is stronger for having owned and "sold" the band and for rooting some of its problems right out of our life. My husband sent me an "I miss you" text from work today, and in that moment I was aware of how far our life and our marriage has come since the band days. We are in a really good place, and I am so very grateful for that. I wouldn't turn away the hard times for anything. You have to know the bad to feel the good. Also, we are slowly working to get out of band debt. One of our big goals is January 2011. That seems far away. Don't get into debt. More words from the wise ... :)

And on a finally note: The fertility update

I am on the fence about the Clomid conversation that I need to have with my midwife tomorrow at my 6 week check up. Wish me luck and clarity.

Nieces and Nephews

I've got 6 and one on the way ... right this minute. I can't wait for Vincent to get here. His mom is dilated to a 10, and they are waiting for him to drop a little before she pushes. I know she is in pain right now, and I just want her to know how much I love her and now grateful I am that she is bringing the first little MacAllister boy into the world. What a gift to all of us! Both she and Vincent are such special additions to our family and our lives.

I love all my nieces and nephews. Around here people have about 100 of them, but I have 6 (almost 7), and they each mean the world to me.

Taryn, Drake, Hadyn, Calli, Dax, Peyton, and soon to be Vincent. What little treasures!!

Praying at Church

Yesterday we walked the stroller by our church (and around it at Quinn's request). Quinn gets very excited about this. She points out any church she sees ... and trust me, there are a lot of them around here. And whenever she is playing at home and pretending to go somewhere, she picks up her toys and says, "Bye Mom, I go to church."

I took the chance yesterday as we were walking by to ask her what we do at church. She said in a little reverent whisper, "We pray." The best part was she kind of said it in a tone as to say, "Mom, did you forget?" She also said that we sing songs and say our ABC's.

Then today at Church we had a very adorable but long-winded speaker. It was about the time that the meeting should be over, when the last speaker finally stood up to speak. Quinn happen to look over at my friend sitting behind us who had her arms folded as she looked down at her baby. Quinn assumed this meant it was time for the closing prayer (and again, this was a good guess because it would normally have been time to go.) She stood there next to her chair with her arms folded and her head bowed. If other children near her talked, she looked up and shushed them and put her head back down. This went on for quite sometime because, remember, the speaker was not praying, but giving a normal church talk. Finally, Quinn's nanny, who happen to be at church with another family, leaned over and told Quinn she was doing a great job, but it was not time to pray. It took some convincing, but Quinn finally stopped praying!!

Then about 10 minutes later, when she was really getting antsy, she could not wait to get to her nursery class. She did not want to wait for the end of the closing song. Tim said, "It is almost time, Quinn. We just have to say the closing prayer, and then it is time for nursery." She folded her arms and put her head on Tim's knee to wait.

But turns out she wasn't waiting. When the song ended, we could hear that she was saying the prayer herself. "Ah Father, a bess mommy, a daddy, my doggy, my passey, a asher Amen." All done. She was ready to go.

Childhood can really hurt!

This is me as a kid. Age 6. Wearing the eye patch that I had to wear for about 3 years during all my waking hours. My outfit doesn't match, and I have bangs. Did I stand a chance? It is amazing I have come this far. Socially that is. This also may have been the last time I ran!

However, if you look close, you'll see that I was adorable. Lucky McKenna! And Tim was also about the cutest little kid on earth. So, lucky Quinn!!

Yoga for Marriage

I'll be honest.

There are a lot of marriages crashing down around me. I am grateful that mine is not one of them, but all the craziness does make me aware of how hard everyone involved needs to work to keep a marriage happy and healthy.

A friend was talking to me the other day about some of her problems with her marriage. After she told me the story she said, "So, I think I need to go to counseling."

"Amen," I thought. "It is about time someone came up with that plan on their own instead of me trying to make them go."

"I think that is a good idea," I said to her. "I believe in therapy. Therapy and Yoga."

She kind of laughed at the yoga part, but I was dead serious. I believe that yoga can have an amazingly healing influence on our relationships.

It is mostly because Yoga is about personal awareness and acceptance, and a lot of relationship problems involve a lack of awareness and acceptance on both ends.

So, I believe in yoga for marriage.

Remember the word "yoga" comes from the word "yoked," which means balanced. The goal of yoga is to create balance in your life by practicing the art of keeping your mind, body and spirit balanced. This is why a yoga session is called a yoga "practice." The session or class is just a practice for when you really need to be balanced -- which is during your everyday life.

So, I think yoga can save marriages. (It can probably also stop bad ones from forming in the first place.)

When I do yoga, I am constantly striving to be aware of my own limitations. These limitations are not just in my body when I can't do a headstand or whatever. They are mostly in my thinking. Every now and then (ok, a lot of the time) I will find myself thinking negatively about someone else during a yoga class. "Look at that girl who walks in late and then does every pose all perfect in her skimpy little gym outfit....I bet she is not even listening to her body. She can't possibly be as enlightened as me."

Without fail, if I try a little harder to get into a yogic spirit, something will happen in class that opens my eyes. Maybe she falls out of tree pose before me or maybe I learn how to do a new pose by watching her form or listening to her breath. Either way my thoughts and feeling and maybe even my abilities are changed. And I walk away more aware of my own strength and weaknesses and how they might be affecting my life. Weak things become strong things.

A friend had this problem: "He wants me to change fundamental things about myself, and I think that is ridiculous."

Another friend said," There are lots of things I don't like about him, but I just assume I should learn to live with them. But then I am really mean to him because he bugs me."

Just about everyone I know has run across this problem OR its opposite, "He just won't stop spending money!"

Yoga, my friends.

Balance. Awareness. New perspectives. He needs to see you, and you need to see him. Yoga can help.

My ideas about marriage and my relationship with Tim have changed a lot over our six years as a married couple. A lot of those changes in my thinking have come from better understanding what he wants in our relationship and being willing to give up some of my previous expectations when I realize they just do not jive with his.

I might have been that wife who does everything with her husband. Takes him to the store. Asks him his advice on everything. Holds hands in public. Does not make decisions alone ... but when it comes down to it, Tim doesn't like shopping and he needs his own space. Instead of fighting it, I just refocus on enjoying the things I enjoy and appreciating my space.

There are poses I would love to be able to do in yoga. Some are never going to happen, and so I stop wasting my emotional energy on them. Other will come with patience and time. And I am reminding of these things every time I step on a mat.

I am not always very nice. Tim doesn't fight back very often. But occasionally when I accuse him of something (small, like being lazy or not wanting to spent time with me) he'll say something like, "How is that fair? You get to do whatever you want." I'm grateful for these moments because he is mostly right. I don't want him to come home and read the news online when he could be talking to me, but If I want to be doing something on the computer IT IS IMPORTANT SO LEAVE ME ALONE AND TAKE CARE OF THE KIDS UNTIL I AM DONE!

Yoga is about knowing when to push and when to pull. It is about being aware of your whole self in each moment and not assuming you or anyone else is the same as they were yesterday.

Balance. Change of perspectives. Awareness of limits, strengths, and weaknesses. Awareness and acceptance of others' limits, strength and weakness. Love, peace, energy. Rejuvenation.

I believe in Yoga.

And therapy.

And Zoloft ... when it comes to that. :)

First Dentist Visit

Quinny went to the dentist for the first time this morning. They counted and polished her teeth and gave her a toy cell phone and a tooth brush. I would not say that she was in heaven because a few times when asked to open her mouth and lay back, she looked at me and said, "I no wan' to." It was pretty cute.

But she loved squirting the "water gun" and the air puffer. She held the little tooth mirror the whole time and sent her dog-dog before the fire squad before she agreed to ANYTHING. (BTW: her dog-dog has 6 teeth and she has 17.) She sat in my lap the whole time and let them polish her teeth, which only took about 30 seconds, and she let the dentist have a good look around in there.

She gets to move up to big girl tooth paste, and she needs to brush a bit more in the back.

I think she had a good time. I wanted to take her in to make sure she had her own positive experience before TV or anyone else teaches her that it is scary AND I really wanted to get her teeth checked out since I am such a mess in there. Dear me.

Anyway, I highly recommend taking your little ones to the dentist. It's probably free if you have insurance, so think of it as a cheap outing and a good learning experience.

My little tribute to Michael J

I have always loved an underdog. I cry for the losers and I root for them until the end. This is sometimes a conflict with my husband when I root against Tiger Woods, who is clearly no loser, and is clearly my husband's hero.

In the height of Michael Jackson becoming a crazy person that people mocked in the early 1990's, I named my bunny "Michael J" in tribute to this man who was once an adorable black kid and who I truly believed was still a wonderful person and artist. Even through the end I have believed the story that Michael Jackson is a tortured soul who is stuck in childhood and who never really did anything wrong. No, don't get me wrong, I wasn't standing outside the court house releasing dove's for each not guilty verdict, but I did think he was probably wronged.

I think it is part of who I am to give people the benefit of the doubt. Life is scary and sad if you don't have this habit.

So I want to remember Michael Jackson fondly. Here is my list of happy thoughts about Michael J, the man, not the bunny:

1. The Jackson 5 Christmas album that is our family's favorite. I especially like where little Michael says, "Yeah, but my list means more than fun. Love and peace for everyone." Nothing like a Motown Christmas and little boy with all kinds of soul.

2. The Billie Jean video. Nothing says Saturday morning hanging out with my brother and sister as kids like "Billie Jean's not my lover, she's just a girl who says that I am the one. But the ???? is not my son." We thought the missing word was Chad ... not child or kid or whatever it is.

3. The Black or White video. Cool and creepy at the same time, this video had that amazing face-morphing-thing at the end of the song that morphed all kinds of people together. Really cool. Then it got creepy and had 10 minutes of Michael Jackson looting an empty city street. That part of the video was never really seen again, but I remember watching it in full the night of the premiere.

4. Heal the World. Make it a better place -- I specifically remember watching this song during the Super Bowl Half Time. But I also remember singing it in junior high choir!! Awesome!

5. The Jackson's -- A made-for-TV movie. I remember learning about Michael Jackson's childhood through a TV movie. This is where I bonded with young Michael and decided to just love him forever.

Done. That is my list. Rest in peace.

Pictures of my Averykins

I posted tons of pictures of McKenna on her blog. Here is the link!!

See pics of McKenna here

memberoftheband.blogspot.com