Cylce of Abuse

There are nearly no abusive men in my life. And it is a good thing because I would not tolerate that very well. I once dated a guy who had some tendencies to be emotionally abusive. I was dazed for awhile, and then saw the light. Thank goodness. I still hate him. The stress he caused me has given me stomach problems for years.

But unfortunately I recently was exposed to someone else's emotionally abusive situation, and it broke my heart. It is breaking my heart. The saddest part was that as I helped my friend find comfort and information about what to do, we found tons of facts about emotional abuse. She said, "It's weird because it feels so personal to me, but it looks like I've been living a textbook case." It was true. We would find Web sites that outlined her relationship exactly. The specifics of her abuse weren't there, but the cycle and how it made her feel was laid out perfectly. It really scared us both. It has made me really sad. I spent one whole day last week just crying -- for her and for the fact that these kinds of abusers exist. (Pregnancy probably also helped with the water works.)

Again, I'm pretty hard core. Obviously I am all about women's rights. I think that we rock and that we deserve the very best treatment from everyone on earth because we are women and we rock. Got it? It is simple logic to me. My friend has helped me become more aware of this other world. I ask all of you this week to look at the women in your life and make sure they are all OK. Make sure they are being treated fairly and equally in their relationships. Look up a Web site about emotional abuse and make yourself more informed. I had never considered the language of, "I think you are so unhappy because you are being abused." But the one time I had the guts to kindly and lovingly bring up that possibility to a troubled friend it changed a lot of lives for the better.