Plan in Pencil

Do any of your ladies remember getting to a point in your marriageable youth when you didn't want to make plans because you didn't know if Mr. Right was around the conner? 'Cause if he was better not switch corners at the last minute. Anyway, for a short while I was almost paralyzed by this thought because it meant so much to me to start a family, and I wanted to do it as soon as possible. But a wise person told me that I had to go on with my life and have a plan. But he said, "Plan in Pencil." Plan. Go full speed ahead, but do it in pencil. You can always change the plan if you need to.

We all know I practiced this preaching when I "planned" on serving a mission, got a mission call, changed the departure date three times and then got marriage instead.

Motherhood is also pretty good practice for this, but it is more about the daily plan. Remember my excitement for Quinn's first day of nursery at church? I picked the outfit, did a test run, talked to her teachers, got the camera ready and was ready to go. But in 18-month-old fashion she was sick with a cough, and the penciled plan was ... postponed. (I was not about to have her get pegged as the nasty, sick, coughing kid on the very first day!)

Pencil. Temporary. It is a nice feeling because you remember that you have a lot of the control over your life. Remember how my husband is in a rock band? We use a lot of pencil. I think I like life this way. When Tim was starting his big corporate job a few years ago, I had a panic attack because I felt like the job and the plan were all in ink. Forever. I hated it. Hence, I added the Chris Merritt clause which changed the plan to pencil. 8 months later... erase.... and here we are.

Tim has been talking about moving to the east coast. I'd love to. Sounds great. But I am going to plan on staying here ... in pencil. I will stay completely invested in the moment, the neighborhood, the job and my very wonderful friends and deal with the east coast if the official erase ever happens. (I liked to try and see him erase without me on board. Good luck, baby.)

Fertility is also all about pencil.

A favorite teacher once said in Winston Churchill fashion, "You have to plan, you have to plan, you have to plan, and you can't do anything without a plan." And like any good scholar, I researched the theory and added to it ... in pencil.