2 things you like about McKenna

I've been trying to get to the root of why Quinn and I don't really get along. There are a few issues -- most are MY FAULT or just life. I can own that. But I also know I recent Quinn when she doesn't treat McKenna well. I side with McKenna because -- unlike Quinn -- I am a little sister and not a big sister. I have been trying to figure out what I could do to get Quinn to be nicer. Then I had the sad -- really sad -- realization that Quinn just might never like McKenna. I didn't feel likes by my siblings when I was little, and it was really painful. I know I don't have much control over this, but if I can change it, I will. "be nice" just doesn't always cut it. I want my girls to know each other and value each other and their differences.

So I started Operation "think about your sister." Every few days I take a girl aside and ask her to think about her sister and come back and report. I asked Quinn, "think about McKenna today and think of two things you like about her." I whispered these requests and make them feel like a game and a secret. Quinn came up with some beautiful things. She likes that Kenna is playful and that Kenna cries when her sisters get in trouble. Later she asked, "you know that thing I did for McKenna? Is Kenna gonna do that for me? Is Kenna gonna do it for Lizza?" I told her, if she did it would be a special secret. :) Since we started this, everyone is getting along much better. I am hearing more kind voices. New group games. It is music to my ears.

So, we'll see how it goes. I used to be mad at my mom for not making my siblings be nice to me. Now what I am older I get where she was coming from in her hands off approach. But it still hurt. So, onward, toward a cure for the future, I guess. Wish me luck.