Charlie's First Birthday

Turns out Charlie was born on the anniversary of MLK's "I have a Dream Speech." Fitting since that speech changed the world -- as Charlie has changed every little fiber of me. It's been a year since he completed our family and since he nearly died while coming out. It's been a year since people start gawking at my giant baby and since I started jumping and screaming from PTSD. It's been a year or squeezing his chubby thighs and hoping they never go away. It's been a year of 18 month onesies with big boy collars and NO PANTS. A year of pacifiers and preferring a pack N play in the closet to his crib in his big bedroom. It's been a year of a family too big to fit in a car. A year of nick pain and shoulder pain and the single dimple that makes it worth it.

I don't always (or ever) know the meaning of life. I don't love just because I should. But for now these thighs, these smiles, this giant head that comes right at me when I ask for a kiss. Nursing and laughing and hugging. These things make life better and more beautiful.

So yesterday we celebrated Charlie's first year and that our family has been complete for a year. We taped a tree on a wall made of cut outs or all the hands and feet in our family. We celebrated our 120 fingers and toes and all we overcome as we grow together. We had family hugs and went around a circle each remembering pieces of Charlie's first year. And after great thought and consideration from his sisters, we bought Charlie a jack in the box -- because as Kenna remembered -- he LOVES surprises.

Happy Birthday, Brandon Charles and Happy Anniversary to out little family. We did it.